Tag Archives: Health

Ch19 Meditation: A Powerful Change Agent

Sitting down alone for a few minutes is the last thing we think to do, and the easiest, most powerful thing we can do.

For the first forty years of my life, I never really argued. But, in a post-divorce relationship, I found myself in intense arguments, every week or so. We argued about everything and nothing: economics, politics, rainbows, and relationships. Most times when the arguing subsided, I didn’t know what happened. It was like when you get tossed upside down by a wave. You’re struggling and swimming for air, but don’t know which way is up. When you make it up for air, that world of tumult is a scary dream, that has no relationship to your normal reality as you bob along the surface and breathe.

He suggested, maybe we should try meditation.

“What?! Are you saying that an hour forced saying nothing would be better than being together naturally?”

“Yeah, maybe,” he replied.

For once, I couldn’t argue. (I tried.)

I picked up guided meditation courses from Pema Chodron that advised to watch your thoughts with an amused chuckle, but not attach to them. I loved listening to her and got a taste of the power of meditation. I was curious but I didn’t stick with it long enough to jar me out of my well-worn ways.

I tried a Zen meditation class, but it wasn’t for me. If my thoughts were a sometimes a problem, they definitely were when I was trying to sit motionless for 20 minutes with a slightly itchy nose. When a monk pulled me out of the class to correct my posture, so I could sit longer, again, my thoughts definitely didn’t quiet down or become more compassionate.

A few months later I saw a sign for a Sahaja Yoga Meditation Class at my local YMCA. I like yoga! And if it’s yoga-meditation, maybe I can handle that. So, I put on my yoga pants and showed up.

Just for clarification, Yoga in the title of that class reflected the meaning: yoga = connection to the divine.  So, to my surprise, I found myself sitting in a 90-minute meditation class. The class itself was a combination of discussion, guided meditation, silent meditation, and/or meditating to music.

Sitting there doing nothing, things changed. Getting dinged with nuggets like “Thinking is limited” and “thoughtless awareness”, I was changed. From the first week, I knew I had experienced a subtle, but definite shift in my world.

I wasn’t sure what all was happening to me. Primarily, I just liked it. I felt good during and after class. My research-based mind could not deny that on the days I meditated, my behavior was better. That is, at the end of the day, I just had fewer things to beat myself up about.

Meditation is simply taking a break from the arguing in your head, and realizing there’s nothing to argue about anyway.

Slow-mo

When I started meditating, I started watching my thoughts. For the first time ever, I had a way to get out of the argument with myself. I was able to step back and be the audience, chuckling at the antics as you would observe toddlers bickering over a toy.

By that time, I wasn’t dating the original reason I got into the class, but he and I remained friends. I noticed in the relationship with him, my family members and at work, things changed.

If I was at peace, really solidly grounded, before meeting with someone, I wouldn’t slip into arguments. Instead of immediately reacting to something I heard, with an onslaught of thinking, accusations, and analysis, I could stop. I would set thinking aside for a bit and start with the truth of the situation. That is, you and I are more alike than different. We are connected and I admire you. The words you are saying don’t define our relationship.

Family relationships are the hardest to evolve, because like magnets, we keep snapping back into the original pattern. And so it was with me and several family members. I could head out with the best intentions, but within a few minutes of contact, I’d be complaining, gossiping and talking about people who I had no business talking about. I’d leave and feel terrible.

Once, I was on my way out the door. I had my purse over my shoulder and keys in hand. But I’d felt scattered and uneasy and didn’t want to meet anyone in that condition.

So, I ran back in and plopped down on the floor and set down my keys. Sitting there, I did my grounding meditation. Two hands on the floor, letting the earth (or floor of my third-floor apartment) accept all the negativity. I did a kundalini raising motion. I said affirmations, moving my hand to different locations as I’d been taught. I ended with a protective shielding ritual, moving my hand like a rainbow from side, over the top, down to the other side.

I felt better. I walked out the door and had an easy meeting. Things were said, but my slow-mo response would kick in. I’d hear the words, but I wouldn’t accept them as truth. And I would watch the fury going off in my head too, but I wouldn’t accept that as truth either. Instead, I felt the simple, unarguable deeper truth of love.

I developed a new response. I would sit silently, smiling. It sounds innocent enough, but it’s actually pretty awkward. If you’ve been a partner in gossip and complaining for decades, to simply leave your cohort hanging without reinforcement is noticeable. They are definitely going to think you didn’t hear, and after they repeat it and get the same response, they are going to think you are rude and probably mentally slow.

The other person is going to feel a bit awkward, but it is indeed the best option. This magical combination of slow-mo, silence and smile let me float about the murky knee-jerk habits that had been ingrained forever.

By trial-and-error, I did the research. I learned that making sure I was totally grounded and at peace before I encountered someone was the key to a successful interaction. Then I could grab that split-second of pause, that allowed me to walk a new, wonderful path in my relationships.

Aha, is that what the smile on the seated Buddha statues is all about? Serenity.

Peaceful, Powerful

When I read a fitness book once, they said, do whatever combination you want, but if you just want immediate results, go running!

Meditation has a similarly powerful effect. You can do all kinds of things, but if you just want to cut to the chase, meditate. Or, as my Buddhist friend says they say jokingly, “Sit Down and Shut Up!”

Meditation changed my life for the better, in a profound way. Simply sitting down with the many sides of yourself and making peace, is a surprisingly powerful act.

When you do this, though, you’ll also feel like you are a bit lost and could use a mentor. That’s where audio books, online podcasts or in-person classes come in. Search and keep trying various types. Little by little, you’ll learn more and find one or more that you like.

What is so scary about sitting down doing absolutely nothing for five minutes? Nothing. Try it!

Meditation Research

Since my childhood, much of the advice about health has evolved. While there are many differences of opinion, most converge with some basic advice: Get regular exercise. Eat plenty of fruits and vegetables. Limit processed foods.

Many now espouse that meditation, or mindfulness, should be a basic part of the recipe for good health. And that within a decade, it will be a commonly accepted fact.

A cursory search shows dozens of applications of meditation for improved health. Meditation has been shown in some cases to improve irritable bowel syndrome, lung cancer, acute respiratory infections, sleep disorders and stress in teenagers.

Are you struggling with an addiction or a chronic health condition? Meditation could help! Certainly, it is less expensive and has no side effects, thus making it an attractive alternative to prescriptions or surgery. If you’ve tried everything else, or aren’t sure what to do next, try meditation.

Eastern philosophy often considers a physical illness to be a manifestation of an emotional or spiritual inner conflict that has festered. Meditation is a way to address these conflicts, thus limiting or healing the physical damage. Skeptical? No problem. You don’t have to believe anything about a mind-body-spirit connection. Just act as a scientist. Try meditating and see how you feel.

“Silence is the

language of God.

All else is

poor translation.”

- Rumi

 


 

Exercises

  • First, meditate for a few minutes so you will get over any fear or mystery. Sit down for five minutes with no agenda. Set a timer. Don’t get up until the time is up. Sit eyes open, eyes closed, think whatever thoughts you want. Just let five minutes pass. “Nowhere to go. Nothing to do.” Okay. Good!
  • Next, start learning about meditation by doing it. This week, go to the library and check out an audio or go online and find a guided meditation. There are many free resources. Look for a guided meditation specifically for beginner’s. I like authors: Jon Kabat-Zinn, Jack Kornfield, Pema Chodron, and the online course of freemeditation.org from Sahaja Meditation but there are dozens to choose from!
  • Okay, so now you know that there are many styles of meditation, just as you’d find variety in yoga or other exercise classes! It’s time to go sit with others. Search for a meditation group in your area. Try meetup.com, Buddhist centers, or yoga centers. You might find a Zen Buddhist Center, a Transcendental Meditation class or a meditative yoga class. Many religions have a meditative practice. You just may have to search a bit to find them. Sitting around with people doing absolutely nothing is a bit wacky to our Western mind. But, it’s a quick way to balance yourself, feel better and simply live better. You owe it to yourself to try it!
  • Anytime you’re feeling ‘off’, take a few minutes to become still. Don’t call it meditation if that sounds too serious! Just take a break from what you’re in the middle of. Allow yourself to relax and get centered before you interact with someone or return to your work.
  • Meditate for improved health. Is there a physical condition or addiction you are battling? Research online to find out if there is a link between meditation and solving that condition. If so, read about it and allow yourself the option that meditation could help you overcome or lessen that issue in your life.
  • As with all changes, use your state of inner peace to guide you. Get still and see how you honestly feel. Do you like the meditation class? Do you feel comfortable? Do you feel better? Do you admire the teachers? Do they ‘have something you want’, as in, do they practice something you want to learn?

 

Meditation is simply taking a break from the arguing in your head, and realizing there’s nothing to argue about anyway.

It clears the way for an easy connection with pure creativity and divine energy.

Ch12 Meet Your Parasympathetic System

If you’re stressed out, your parasympathetic system is out of shape.

 

Most of Western physical education is directed to our sympathetic nervous system: the fight-or-flight abilities. If you can run fast and jump high, you’re great at sports and thus, you appear healthy. Being able to go, go, go is due to the abilities of your Sympathetic Nervous System. When you’re running down the basketball court, digestion, defecation, urination, sexual arousal and sleep are (hopefully) not the body’s top priority.

 

But there are two parts to your Autonomic Nervous System. The complement to the sympathetic nervous system is the Parasympathetic Nervous System. If you’re like me, you might think, I remember something about that from biology class, but had no clue how it related to my quality of life.

 

The parasympathetic system is responsible for the part of your body that stimulates the rest-and-digest activities in your body.

 

And like the yin and yang of any situation, it’s great to be able to go, go, go, but we also need to be able to stop.  A healthy body goes back to a low resting heart rate, and works on those important tasks of maintaining and recharging our bodies.

 

If you are having problems with digestion, gas, sleeping, sexual arousal, defecation or urination, the problem is some aspect of the parasympathetic system. You’ve got a flabby, out-of-shape parasympathetic system.

 

Not knowing how to calm your mind and body down so you can sleep or digest will manifest health problems, similar to how a lack of physical exercise manifests the inability to move with agility or speed.

 

My parent’s generation didn’t talk about working on their triceps, lats or abductors. But we do. And we learned the specific exercises to strengthen and tone our bodies. Weightlifting, stretching, running, dancing or playing sports are all options we know and use.

 

It’s worth learning a similar regimen of exercises to ensure that the other half: the parasympathetic system is cared for. Breathing exercises, guided meditation, tai chi or dozens of other approaches can be used.

 

If we as a society knew how to maintain our parasympathetic systems, could we eliminate or reduce ‘stress-related disease’? That would be huge, right?

 

Enjoying life to the fullest happens when we are in balance. Knowing how to maintain our bodies sympathetic and parasympathetic systems are foundational techniques. Let’s learn these, teach our kids and practice them. We’re worth it!

 

Peace in Every Bite

When I was in Korea once, I stayed overnight at Buddhist Temple. There we got a glimpse of the monastic life, living by their rules for a day.

 

In order to eat with the monks, we were first trained on the detailed mealtime ritual. We unwrapped our chopsticks, placed bowls carefully, were served, ate and cleaned up in a prescribed, quiet manner.

 

By not talking during the mealtime, our sense of appreciation for the meal itself was heightened. I noticed the texture of the handmade bowl, the way our rice was scooped onto our plates, the small piece of radish I used to clean my bowl when I was done. We were also instructed to eat every morsel we took, so we were careful to not take more than we were actually hungry for.

 

With all the talking gone, the meal itself became a wonderfully soothing way to recharge body and spirit.

 

Rest and digest

Knowing that the parasympathetic system has two big jobs of resting and digesting, it makes sense to figure out how to improve the quality of these two functions.

  • Just as you would think about and take proactive steps to help the rest and digestion for a small child, take the same steps for yourself.
  • Make mealtimes a nurturing, soothing time.
  • If you have to discuss something contentious, choose a time other than mealtimes to hash it out.
  • Consider the surroundings. Arrange chairs, table and the setting to have a refreshing view.
  • Choose healthy, colorful, beautiful food to make mealtimes a healing time.
  • At night, notice the stream of thoughts. If you’ve forgotten to do something or are procrastinating about something, write it down and make a plan for tomorrow.
  • If your mind is racing, develop a practice to calm down. Sit on the floor for 5-10 minutes before bedtime, or distract the worrying mind with a quick gratitude list.
  • If your body is fidgety, develop a new nighttime ritual. Try a few things and see what works: Take a walk an hour or two before bed. Eliminate caffeine late in the day. Do some stretching or listen to some sweet music.
  • If you’re having serious symptoms with your resting or digesting, begin research and commit to trying various solutions to improve your health.

 

 

Learn how to provide

peaceful states for your body so it can properly rest and digest.

 


 

Instant Relief

Throughout the day, notice your stress level. When it peaks, try a quick calming technique:

  • Gaze at the sky, a natural scene, puppies or babies.
  • Laugh!
  • Make a gratitude list.
  • Step away from your work. Stretch.
  • Share an encouraging message with a friend. (text, social media, letter)
  • Take care of a niggling detail of life, instead of putting it off one more day.

 

Calming your mind supports the parasympathetic system  functions. Learning how to manage stress will improve your behavior and inner peace, as well as your physical condition.


Exercises

  • Does your fitness routine include any training for calming your parasympathetic system? Do you already have some techniques you use: deep breathing, massage, walking, meditation or prayer to calm your body down?
  • Do you have any troubles with falling asleep at night? Does your mind race or your body twitch? Do you have techniques for calming down so you can sleep well?
  • How is your digestion? Do you have indigestion or feel bloated or uncomfortable? What are your mealtimes like? Are they a nurturing, soothing time or are they argumentative and rushed?
  • What are the physical symptoms you notice that remind you you’re getting stressed out, as you move through your day? What quick fix techniques work for you? Develop a list of five techniques and use them proactively when you detect a hint of stress. Change your top five techniques over time to keep it fresh and effective.
  • Change your fitness routine to include calming exercises, weekly or daily. Give them the same importance as your other fitness activities. Re-evaluate, revise and deepen every month.

 

 

 

 

Visiting the doctor

Here, people don’t usually go to a general family doctor. They go to a specialist. So, today, I crossed the street and went into On Hospital. I asked to see an Ear Nose & Throat specialist. After about a 15-minute wait, they called my name. I went in and the doctor used a scope to examine my throat. Have you ever seen your vocal cords?  I got to and he said I had a condition called blahblahblah. What’s that? Your voice has changed. Right. That was my original complaint ….I lost my voice!

I also got to see inside my ears. Gross! Earwax, hair and ear canal.

I thought I was going to see inside my nose too but instead he suddenly started ‘irrigating’? my nose? Like at the dentist, when they spray water and suck it out at the same time. Wow, that was startling, and possibly refreshing! I could breathe clearly for awhile.

He said he was going to give me a prescription. Bye!  Oh, what type of medicine, I asked? Oh, it’s safe, he answered. Uhh, I mean, like what is the medicine? Oh, you know, anti ….   Antibiotics? I asked.  Yes, and analgesics and other things that will make you feel better. Oh, okay.

I paid $7 for the visit and $5 for the medicine (which has a list of seven items …unknown to me what they actually are.) And I hate to report, but you do feel better instantly when the doc gives you meds.

So, three times a day, I take an assortment of 5-6 pills, gargle with something else, and drink a liquid pouch of something else too.

Yeah! I tried to be a conscientious consumer, but I can’t even read the directions on the Tylenol package, so trust is all I got left.

How to use 6 hours of sick time

I’m not sure if it was the smoke at the Fuzzy Navel bar, singing our hearts out for a few hours at the Singing Room (noraebang), or if I picked up something, but over the past week, I gradually lost my voice.

By Tuesday night, I knew I was in trouble. I taught my 7 pm Conversation Class, and a 1-to-1 private student ending at 9 pm, and headed straight home.

I didn’t sleep well. I kept waking up trying to figure out how best to use my whopping 6 hours of sick time. Not 6 days. YBM gives us a whopping 6 hours of sick time per 12-month contract.

On Wednesdays this month, I teach 5 hours from 6:50 am to 1 pm, plus two more hours at night: Conversation Class and a new 1-to-1 student. If I called in sick tonight, I could skip the am but would still have to teach one hour at night and all day the following day.

On Thursdays, I teach 6 hours in the morning from 6:50 am straight to 1 pm. Plus another hour at night. Hmm  I could skip Thursday am, but would still have to teach all day Wednesday, and again Thursday night.

Is that possible?

I take great efforts to make sure I’m always loving being with my students. But it was really hard Wednesday teaching in a whisper. Luckily, my students know me by now, so we could laugh about it and they were really sweet to me, the English Whisperer. I made it somehow until 1 pm.

My director was able to reschedule my 1-to-1′s, got someone to teach at night for me, and someone else to do my two early am classes. So, I had Wednesday night off.  I had a massage and rested. I came to work on Thu at 10 am, taught one class, then we had our xmas party watching a video with my friend’s class …so that was a huge break. I still had to come back and whisper (I mean teach) another class. But because it was the day before xmas eve, we played games and drank tea. It was fun, but by the end of the day, my voice was totally gone.

The schools I’m looking at in Mexico have a concept called “substitute teachers”. HA HA. This is something I didn’t really ask about. Sick time. Substitutes. Not a common concept here.

I always thought, I never appreciated my health until I was sick. Now, I appreciate the ability to go home when I am sick. wow

Wonderful Amazing Korean Food

When you’re sick, there are so many wonderful, nutritious Korean foods to choose from. I’m in love with Korean Food (Korean food, saranhayeo!)

Wednesday morning on my hour break, I went into a little 24-hr Korean food place (think ‘diner’ Korean-style). I ordered 만두국 (mandu kuk), dumpling soup. (click link for photos)

Later, I picked up chicken salad cranberry croissant sandwiches from Paris Baguette. That and sweet bread filled with red bean paste and cream.

For lunch, I made myself a banana sandwich …a treat we learned from our old friend Ron in Australia.

For dinner on Thursday, I stopped at another favorite diner. On my way to teach my evening class, I had kimchi chigae. Now, like most Koreans, I think kimchi has some magical healing properties. It’s a vegetable (cabbage), fermented, with spicy red peppers…why wouldn’t it be magical! ha ha

Kimchi chigae (김치 찌개) is a stew served boiling, with kimchi, pork, green peppers, onions in a rich broth. Eat it with the side of rice, plus more kimchi and other side dishes. For 3500 won (about $3), it’s good, quick, very wonderful.

Sick in Korea

In the last 1.5 days, I picked up some kind of sore throat and cough. At home, if I was sick, I’d stay home from work for a day, rest and then return to work.

But in Korea, most people, don’t have that luxury. Me, for example. I have 6 hours of sick time every 12 months. And there’s no substitute teachers so most teachers just keep teaching when we’re sick. In the rare case when someone doesn’t teach, the other teachers have to cover the additional classes.

Students keep coming to class when they’re sick too. There doesn’t seem to be the same concept that we usually express so compassionately as, “Why did you come in? You’re so sick, you’re getting us all sick! Go home!”

In Korea, most workers need a doctor’s note that they were sick. So, if they go to the doctor, they usually go and get a vitamin drip…an intravenous (IV) injection of some combination of vitamins or nutrients?!? Antibiotics and other nearly recreational drugs are often also part of the remedy. Then, they usually return straight back to work.

Also, my students think it’s funny that we would eat chicken soup when we’re sick. Since I haven’t seen anything like Campbell’s chicken noodle soup in the local supermarkets, today I had Korean spicy seaweed ramen. Ooh, that was actually delicious and was just what I wanted (for 1000 won, or $1).

That and citron tea. The tea looks like a jar of lemon jam with lots of lemon peel slices in it. You put a spoonful or two in hot water and stir. It’s kinda like that lemon & honey or lemon & brandy remedy.